摘要：著名演员“拔叔”马兹·米克尔森接受了一项特别的挑战 —— 英国公民测验。他以独特的视角诠释了英国人对茶的热爱、礼仪与幽默感，展现了文化差异的趣味性。荧幕上看似不苟言笑的拔叔，私下可是很幽默的哟！
著名演员“拔叔”马兹·米克尔森接受了一项特别的挑战 —— 英国公民测验。他以独特的视角诠释了英国人对茶的热爱、礼仪与幽默感，展现了文化差异的趣味性。荧幕上看似不苟言笑的拔叔，私下可是很幽默的哟！
I am a big fan of Tabasco though, but I don't see it going into my tea.
虽然我很喜欢塔巴斯科辣酱，但我不想加这个。
You said a thing.
确实如此。
I was waiting for the elevator yesterday and the door opened and somebody's coming out and they say, oh, I'm sorry.
昨天我在等电梯，电梯门开了，有人出来了，他们说，哦，对不起。
What are you sorry about?
为什么要说对不起？
There was no Brits surviving the Titanic obviously, because everybody was after you, Sir, after you.
显然在泰坦尼克号上没有英国人幸存下来，因为所有英国人都排在别人身后说着，“您先请，先生，您先”。
I like the idea that you don't waste time on the letter G.
我喜欢英国人G不发音的习惯。
Have you got a good Cockney accent as well?
你也有一口纯正的伦敦腔吗？
No, I'm really...
不，实际上我——
Mads, absolute pleasure.
麦德斯先生，很荣幸邀请您来参加我们的节目。
Thank you so much for sitting down with us today, taking on the Joe British Citizenship Test.
非常感谢你今天来参加英国公民身份测试。
What do you think it means to be a true British person?
你认为一个真正的英国人会有什么表现呢？
It's kind of very British to dislike Man United.
表现之一就是不喜欢曼联。
And little like, it's very German to hate Bayern Munich.
就像典型的德国人讨厌拜仁慕尼黑那样。
I'm a Man United fan.
我就是曼联的粉丝。
Mads, first task that we have for you today, as you can see laid out in front of you, is everything needed to make a cup of tea, a British staple, the brew.
麦德斯，今天我们给你的第一个任务，就是你面前的这些，在这些原料里选几种来泡一杯茶，英国人的日常饮品就是冲泡茶。
Well, some things might not be there to make a cup of tea as well.
嗯，有些东西可不能用来泡英式茶饮。
Are you a tea drinker yourself?
你自己也爱喝茶吗？
Not that much, but if I do, it will be probably this one, the mint thingy.
不经常喝，但如果让我来调配的话，可能会加这个，类似薄荷的东西。
Feel free to make a cup of tea.
按你的想法随意加东西就可以了。
Even though that's my favourite, I think we have to go back to the old school.
尽管我喜欢加这个，但我想还是应该回归经典。
Classical Earl Grey stuff.
来一杯经典的伯爵茶。
So that's it.
所以要加这个。
I'll go for that one.
我就选这个了。
The Monty Python version.
蒙提・派森版。（指他不想按常理出牌）
Ding.
叮。
That I don't believe in.
这个用不到。
这个也用不到。
English tea.
英式茶。
Just like you said, like an afternoon tea or morning tea, whatever.
就像你说的，随便泡杯下午茶或早茶都可以。
Yeah, you can do it.
是的，可以这样。
I'll go for a little milk.
我会加点牛奶。
I think I've always heard that, like little milk in the tea.
我一直听说可以这么做，可以在茶里加点牛奶。
I wouldn't do it, but very British.
平常自己喝的话，我不会加奶，但英国人有加奶的习惯。
And then I'm not going to pour it until the water's in there.
要先加水再加奶。
Why do you think Brits love tea so much?
你认为英国人为什么这么爱喝茶？
It's something to do with India, I guess.
我想这和印度有关吧。
And they also like a little break, just a little break once in a while.
他们也喜欢小憩一下，只是偶尔休息一下。
And if it doesn't have to be a pint of beer every single time, just a sip of milk.
不需要每次都喝一品脱啤酒，喝口牛奶吧。
And that would be it, except for a little squeeze of lemon.
完成了，还差一点柠檬汁。
Go for the lemon.
来点柠檬汁。
In your cup of tea.
加到你的茶里。
Wouldn't you do that in England?
你在英国会这么做吗？
Not to my knowledge.
我不会。
我不会加柠檬汁。
Right, I thought I got you there.
好吧，我还以为能让你露馅了呢。
I failed.
失败了。
Stir around.
搅一搅。
Here you go.
像这样。
Bang, bang, bang.
大功告成。
And the trick with this one is to leave it on the spoon on the table.
有一点要注意，要把它放在桌上的勺子上。
Like that.
像这样。
I mean, it's a cracking effort, Mads.
麦德斯，你做得很好。
It's a cracking effort.
真厉害。
But no straining of the tea bag.
不能使劲拉茶包。
No, of course not.
不，肯定不能。
You have to, like, if there's a little extra part of you that needs more tea, there's a little left on the table.
这样一来，如果你还想再喝点茶的话，桌子上的茶包还可以再用一次。
What's your drink of choice when you're doing a film like Lion King, because it's voice acting?
当你拍《狮子王》这样需要配音的电影时，你会选择什么饮料？
Yeah, in that particular situation, it would be tea, actually, with the honey.
这种情况下，我会喝茶，再加些蜂蜜。
That would be my choice, because I am not a voice actor, I'm not a singer, and I tend to get really hoarse really fast.
我会这么选，因为我既不是配音演员，也不是歌手，而且我的嗓子很快就会嘶哑。
I mean, it was a big part, I don't know, I was young, early 80s, like sitting down, having a cup of tea, talking about something profoundly deep.
我是说，这很重要，我也说不上来，80年代初的时候我很年轻，喜欢坐下来，喝杯茶，谈论一些深刻的东西。
But it's never been on the same scale as in England.
但没有到英国人这种随时随地都来杯茶的地步。
In general, I'm not a hot drink drinker.
我通常不喜欢喝热饮。
For me, it's a little like waiting for the elevator.
对我来说，这有点像等电梯吧。
I just can't, I can't do it.
我做不到，我做不到。
It's too, it takes too long.
需要等太久了。
I like to go like that and empty it.
我喜欢拿起杯子就直接喝光。
I can't wait for that.
我可等不及。
How would you rate your tea out of 10?
满分是10分的话，你给你冲的茶打几分？
Oh, you want me to taste it as well?
你是想让我尝尝吗？
I think if you want to, you're more than welcome to taste it.
如果你想试试的话，非常欢迎你尝尝。
It didn't stay in there too long, did it?
茶包没泡太久吧？
Let's see.
试试吧。
Maybe a little too much milk.
牛奶好像加多了。
I think two more minutes of this will do the trick.
再泡两分钟就更好。
Here you go.
好了。
He didn't go for the tequila.
你没加龙舌兰酒。
This is why we got 9.30 in the morning.
这也是为什么我们能早上9点半到。
Maybe a little too early, even for a ding.
喝龙舌兰好像有点太早了，就算是能通过的话也太早了。
So this is a scenario test, Mads.
麦德斯，接下来是场景测试。
If you pick up the cue card, read it and then let us know the answers.
需要你拿起提示卡，读完后告诉我们你的答案。
Right, so someone's just walking to you and it's their fault.
有人走到你面前，妨碍到你了。
Do you...
那你会——
A.Not say anything.
A.什么也不说。
B.Confront them.
B.直接和他们对质。
C.We all know this is the one.
C.我们都知道这是英国人唯一的答案。
Apologise for being an obstacle.
为妨碍到别人而道歉。
I'm not going, but the Brits are going for C. British.
我不会这样，但英国人肯定会选C。
Why do you think British people apologise for everything?
你认为英国人为什么啥事都要道歉？
It can be some kind of protection shield.
可能是出于某种自我保护的原因吧。
The classic story about there was no Brits surviving the Titanic obviously, because everybody was after you, Sir, after you.
有一个经典故事，说的是泰坦尼克号上没有英国人幸存下来，因为每个人都在说“您先请，先生，您先”。
And the Americans all survived, right?
美国人都活了下来，对吧？
I was waiting for the elevator yesterday, and the door opened, and somebody's coming out, and they say, oh, I'm sorry.
昨天我在等电梯，门开了，有人出来了，他们就说，“哦，对不起”。
你为什么要说对不起？
I mean, you're going out the elevator, right?
我的意思是你得从电梯里出来，对吧？
How would that scenario go in Denmark?
在丹麦会如何呢？
We are on the rural side, definitely.
我们肯定会更日常些吧。
All right, next one.
好了，下一个。
A lovely cup of English tea has just been brought to you, and you are offered a snack to dunk with.
一杯英式茶刚刚端到了你面前，你可以选择一块小吃蘸着茶吃。
Do you take a Snickers bar, digestive biscuit, a slice of bread?
你会选一块士力架、一块消化饼干还是一片面包？
B. Digestive biscuit.
B.消化饼干。
Bang on again.
又答对了。
British people love their biscuits.
英国人喜欢饼干。
And so do I. I do love digestive as well.
我也是，我也喜欢消化饼干。
And it's funny because I worked as a young boy, I worked in a supermarket and we had them, they were there, but we didn't know how to pronounce them.
有意思的是，因为我年轻的时候在一家超市工作，店里就有这种饼干，看着包装上的单词，我们不知道如何发音。
So I called them "b-scu".
所以我叫他们“b-scu”。
I just took it like the Danish word.
我是按丹麦语发音来的。
Nobody understood what it was.
没有人知道我说的是什么。
Someone has repeated themselves for the third time and you still can't work out what they're saying.
有人人重复了三遍，你还是听不懂他们在说什么的话。
Do you A. Ask them to repeat it again.
A.请他们再重复一遍。
Either laugh or agree and just hope they drop it.
要么笑，要么同意，让他们不要再说了。
Turn it on them and accuse them of being rude.
把矛头指向他们，指责他们无礼。
The English way is could be politely ask them to repeat it again.
按英国人的做法是会礼貌地请他们再重复一遍。
Could also be B. Either laugh or agree and just hope they drop it.
也可能是B，要么笑要么同意，希望他们不要再说了。
B is also very Danish, just like, yeah, there's no reason to waste more time on this and just hope it won't pass.
B也很有丹麦风格，是的，无需在这上面浪费更多的时间，不要再继续这个对话就可以了。
I go for B.
我选B。
Bang on.
完全正确。
I love that yours is more of a time-saving and...
我喜欢你节省时间的习惯和……
Always, like, can't wait for the elevator.
我一直这样，我连电梯都不想等。
Yours is efficiency, ours is, I hope the world swallows me up.
你们的效率很高，我们有点不一样，我希望可以慢慢来。
Yeah, because it's an embarrassing situation, we just want to...
是的，有些尴尬，我们就是想……
Get past that one, right?
这个答对了，是吧？
So I got three out of three so far.
到目前为止，我答对了三题。
Three out of three so far.
三个都答对了。
This is the one, right?
这题会比较难，对吧？
If it snows in the UK, do we A. Put a jacket on and get on with it.
如果英国下雪了，我们会——A.穿件夹克继续赶路。
Build a snowman and enjoy it.
堆雪人并享受下雪时光。
Shut the whole country down and complain.
大家都罢工了，然后抱怨。
C. And that is actually also happening in Denmark.
我选C。实际上在丹麦也这样。
It's like, yeah, the first little snowflakes and everything comes to a halt.
当第一片小雪飘起来的时候，大家都歇业了。
We assume Denmark could have it on lock for...
在丹麦，大家可以停一会儿工作……
Yeah, we're ready.
是的，我们准备的很充分。
We've got piles of salt and machines everywhere.
化雪盐和清雪机器都准备好了。
But every time it happens, it's like, oh, my God, got to stay home for two weeks and figure this out.
但每次一下雪，大家都会想天呐，我得在家待两周，等雪化了再说。
And also the whole thing with the traffic on the highways is like a car breaks down, but they don't pull it into the site.
就像如果有一辆车在高速公路上坏了，人们也不会把它拖进工地。
They keep it there forever.
他们把让它一直待在那里。
I don't get it.
我也不理解。
There's four phonetic English sayings.
这里有四条和语音相关的英语谚语。
Try and decipher them and tell me what they mean.
试着破译它们，告诉我是什么意思。
That could be have a look or I'll have a look.
应该是看一看或者我来看一看。
It's not too far away.
有些接近了。
In this context, I would say, oh, do you have a look?
在这种情况下，我会说，哦，你看了吗？
Now I got it.
现在我懂了。
How do you find the English pronunciation sometimes and the British pronunciation of words?
你觉得英式英语的发音和常规英语发音有什么不同或者特别之处吗？
I'm not a specialist at all, but I did grow up with the Munchepinions.
我也不是语言专家，但我是和芒切佩尼人一起长大的。
There's a whole lot of different things going on in there.
二者之间有很大不同。
Obviously, they're Oxfordian English, but also all kind of funny Cockney accents and stuff.
很明显，他们说的是是牛津英语，但也有各种有意思的伦敦口音。
So we grew up with that, me and my brother, and we knew them by heart.
我和我哥哥就是这样长大的，我们把它们牢记于心。
We had no idea what it meant because we didn't speak English.
我们也不知道这是什么意思，因为我们不会说英语。
We just covered it, right?
我们刚刚讲过了，对吧？
Have you got a favourite British accent that you're a fan of?
你有最喜欢的英国口音吗？
There's something about the Cockney accent that is lovely.
伦敦腔有一个可爱之处。
I like the idea that you don't waste time on the letter G, so it's just wuh-uh.
我喜欢英国人G不发音的习惯，所以water的发音像wuh-uh。
A bottle of water.
一杯水。
I like that.
但我喜欢这个。
你也有一口纯正的伦敦腔吗？
No, I'm really scared.
不，我有些害怕。
I mean, I'm pretty good at doing...
我的意思是，我很擅长……
I can parrot it for a while, but I can't really adapt it into a character, it just seems fake for me.
短时间里我可以模仿，但我不能真正把它融入到角色中，对我来说它有些刻意。
It takes a couple of lifetimes for me to get different accents.
我花了很长时间才学会不同的口音。
So no Guy Ritchie call-up any time?
没有盖·里奇这样的角色了吗？
No, but I can be the exotic accent in this film.
不，但我可以在这部电影里用一些异国口音。
How would you use it in a sentence?
在句子中怎么用？
How do you know her?
你怎么认识她的？
You know her.
你认识她。
Absolutely bang on.
完全正确。
So it be, Do you know her? Do you know her?
所以是这么读，你认识她吗？你认识她吗？
You are very good at it.
你很擅长这个。
Thrid one, that's tricky though bacause it's close to awesome.
第三个，这有点难，因为它和awesome发音有点像。
Do you have some?
你有吗？
Close, very close.
接近了，非常接近了。
Say it in a sentence.
说一个完整的句子听听。
Mads Mikkelsen has just made us a lovely cup of tea, and I go, do you have some?
麦德斯·米克尔森刚刚给我们沏了一杯好茶，我问，你来点吗？
Did instead of do.
用did而不是do。
Beautiful, but I love it.
很好，我很喜欢。
I also like the way that you make eight words become one word.
我也喜欢你们把八个单词发音一个单词的习惯。
We do that a lot in Danish.
丹麦语也有很多这样的情况。
So to end this British test, Mads, just before we do...
好了麦德斯，在我们结束这个英国测试之前……
Almost a pass.
差不多及格了。
I'm going to give you a pass, and for passing the Joe British test, you are now an official Joe.
我要给你一个通行证，因为你通过了英国公民的测试，你现在就是正式的英国人了。
British citizen.
英国公民。
There is your passport.
这是你的护照。
And then I have to listen to the national anthem and do this.
我要听国歌，还要做这个动作。
And Northern Ireland as well.
北爱尔兰的护照也给我了。
Got the whole package.
看来你们有一套完整的流程。
Thank you guys. Appreciate it.
谢谢大家。非常感谢。
来源：英语东
